Being a mom in general can bring new struggles into your life , but trying to balance being at a full time job , taking time for yourself , and being a wife can sometimes realllyy be overwhelming. It feels impossible at times and of course the mom guilt kicks in and leaves me wondering , am I doing everything I can , is everyone feeling loved enough , cared for enough ? Am I good enough ? What else can I do ?
I know I’m not alone , and leaves me wondering if any mamas feel this way too ? Let me me know on my new insta post !
The 4 struggles of a working mom (my daily struggles )
1. The Morning Rush-
Please please can there be an extra 5 hours before my alarm snoozes not 5 minutes !! I feel like I look crazy running around getting her diaper and clothes ready to change her getting my tea in the micro , forgetting it , going back to get it , deciding if I wanna skip my hair or makeup that morning because there’s just NO TIME ! It’s so hard to have everything ready even if I planned it the night before , it’s hard waking her up and fighting to put her shoes or jacket on .. lol this is such a struggle I sometimes just sit on the bed next to her and wish so bad I could support her from home but there’s just no way at the moment .
2. The Babysitter is Better Than You-
Ok ok this one is kind of funny and silly , but there’s days I come to pick her up and she won’t even give me a hug or kiss ? She doesn’t want to go home with me , and that can sometimes get to you especially because you spent the last 8 hours missing her , and you’re like wait she didn’t miss me ?? Lol granted I’m soooo beyond thankful I have the best care for her and I’m so blessed she looovesss being with them it’s so easy for me going to work knowing she’ll have a blast and she’ll be taken care of in the best way . But can mommy just get all the love ??
3. Being the Pinterest Mom-
I’m sure we all spend time on Pinterest and see all the amazing meals and snacks and beautiful homes some mamas have and I’m like why can’t that be me ? Some days I’m soo tired I don’t even make them a decent meal , pop in some chicken nuggets for them or mac n cheese and call it a night . I’m sorry babe . Haha it’s soo hard to be this perfect mom , like I just spent 8 hours being away I come home around 5 :30 my list includes to come home make dinner , shower , do laundry , play time w Sav , bath time for Sav , put her to bed around 8:30 and have soomeee time with the husband and by then we’re both sooo tired I’d rather fall asleep with sav by 9 and ditch him (again sorry babe) or we watch a show and stay up till 10 and we’re exhausted the next day ? There’s just NOT enough time in one day for everything , I leave most of my laundry for the weekend which sucks because I have nothing to wear , but I will make damn sure Sav is all good to go , she will always come before anything ! Being perfect is not in the mom book for me it’s being present and doing the best you can because they’ll appreciate everything you do for them no matter what . (Big props to my parents here I never new how hard it would be being so hardworking and making sure your kids always had /have everything they need and never made it known of the struggles ) ❤️
4. Mom guilt –
This is the hardest of them all for me . Why must I always feel guilty for taking time to myself ? I know it’s good for me and her but when she cries for me and wants just to be w mommy and I have to leave my heart literally breaks into pieces .. I’m not going to lie I have a huge attachment issue with her , I feel like she NEEDS me all hours of the day , which I know sometimes yes but it’s good to be away even just for a mani -pedi . I think the attachment issue stems from my when I was younger , since my mother did work all day as well and we were either with a baby sitter or at school and after school we had activities so I feel like I never had a very close close bond with my mom because she was always away , obviously I love her and appreciate everything she’s done for me but growing up that’s what it felt like like she didn’t understand me or didn’t have time for me I was resentful , I feel like if I’m always away she’ll grow into feeling that way too and that makes my heart ache , I want to be her number one she feels close with you know ? I think that’s why I feel so so guilty having to work or going out on a date . I’m working on it tho haha it’s gotten better I promise !
Tips that help me get through it
- Talk to other moms – This is huge for me, having mama friends to vent to and reassure you that your not alone and feeling like this is normal is so good for the soul !i joined a mama group on insta and its been wonderful talking to lovely ladies from all over the country , I’m thinking about starting my own – would you join?
- Log off – So this is something new I’ve been trying which is using the screen time on my iPhone (how sad and pathetic that they invented thisand we have to lock our phones away to stay off it lol ) tbh part of the mom guilt I was feeling too was feeling like I’m not always present when I’m with her after work because I’ll be on my phone scrolling endlessly – I started putting it away until bedtime.i wanted to start feeling more aware of her and pay attention to everything around me – its been soo good. While I do have her I dont want to feel empty and like im not intrested in her , if that makes sense. And also when youre off social media youre not stressing anymore and you stop comparing yourself to others when you don’t see their perfect instagrams / Pinterest .
- Give yourself credit –Please mamas whatever you’re doing or feeling just remember those little eyes are watching you and In Their eyes you are the most magical amazing super mom ever !!! Be thankful for that ! They are so precious and so compassionate towards you and your feeling. At least sav is if she sees I feel down or sad she’ll come and say “mami u okay ?” And hug and kiss me . Like how can you not feel proud that this is your kid and you make them feel soo good and your raising them to be dope little human beings haha ! I started writing little notes to myself through out the day at work like as pick me uppers and that’s helped a bunch ! My favorite is – the very fact that you worry about being a good mom , means you already are one ❤️
She makes it all worth it ❤️